Thursday, 15 September 2016

5 weird things about Instagram

 I love Instagram, I’m not even ashamed to admit it. (@Catscruse, FOLLOW ME, I take a lot of photos of white wine and sunsets and I love pink, okay that’s enough, shameless self promotion over.)

I always used Facebook mostly for sharing photographs, and then along came this entire site dedicated to just that, so I didn’t have to force my pretty avocado on toast upon unwilling family or friends or people I used to work with in 2005 anymore. And ignoring the part where you compare yourself to someone’s edit of a perfect life, and get obsessed with followers and cry over why someone else got 20281 likes on their photograph of an egg and your selfie only got 189, and oh my god I'm uglier than an egg, blah, blah, I think Instagram is mostly a nice thing. It’s fun, it’s pretty, and most people don’t believe it’s real. 

But okay, sometimes it’s a bit weird, isn’t it? Here are 5 of the weird things about Instagram that I’ve noticed. You've noticed them too, but if you've noticed more, feel free to leave them in the comments section below.

1. Logging on to find that someone you’ve never heard of, usually with a username like zacew42c2cxxx, has liked every single one of your photos. All 2122 of them, all the way back to 2012 when you experimentally took a photograph of your toes in the sea in Magaluf and made it black and white because you thought it looked a bit arty. Who are these people? Why have they spent this time on your profile? Why do they like you so much? What do they want? You will never know. When you click on their profile, they have one single photograph of a man's eye, very close up. 

2. Clicking through a popular hashtag, like #love or #holidays, and flicking happily through photographs of puppies and weddings and buckets and spades, only to be confronted by hardcore pornography. Yep, that’s a vagina, looking you right in the face. No, I’d rather not ‘visit your site now,’ young lady, but thanks for asking. (This is so much worse if you’re idly perusing Insta in a public place, like on a train, and someone has almost definitely seen it over your shoulder and now they think you’re a weird perv.) 

3.  Finding a bafflingly obscure but huge fandom that you can't believe exists. Justin Bieber, fine. Zoella, okay. But it’s just insane how far this goes. Like there are whole groups of Instagrammers out there, right now, just dedicated to celebrities you’ve literally never heard of – like some minor youtuber called Sammy Rebecca or something.  Username IheartSammyRebecca2001, bio '14, single, Sammy Rebecca is lyf! ANGEL LIKED 2015!' And all they've uploaded is 120 photographs of the same girl, but in different colours, like a fucked up Andy Warhol painting. It makes you nostalgic for the days when you just  cut out pictures of Robbie Williams and stuck them on your school folder. <3 450="" a="" and="" andy="" brother="" colours="" crap="" different="" edits="" endless.="" girl="" identical="" in="" it="" like="" liked="" much="" o:p="" of="" pointless="" s="" same="" sammy="" so="" the="" then="" there="" this="" time.="" tribute.="" warhol="" x2="">

4. People who use hashtags that could never conceivably be used by another person ever, and which read like an indecipherable drunk text: #dontdrinkfivejaegerbombswithnodinner #almostpassedoutonthewayhomelolthisisyourfaultashley - who do they think is clicking on these? What do you think a hashtag is for??

5. Or, almost as annoying, #people #who #hashtag #every #word #of #their #sentences #for #no #reason. Nobody is following the hashtag ‘their.’ Nobody. Stop #it.



1 comment

  1. Lol this made me actually laugh! The porn was a real shock first time I came across it.
    livinginaboxx | bloglovin


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